For those of you who have known me for years, will be aware that my business did not start out as coaching. I was actually an image consultant (personal stylist). I really enjoyed my job - I got to help women design their dream wardrobe, then I would go shopping for them to make it a reality. I now do the same thing with my coaching clients, but instead of helping them design their ideal wardrobe, I am helping them to design their dream life and/or career. Instead of going out and selecting the garments for them, I coach them to take the action and turn their dream into a reality.
Image coaching, life coaching and career coaching all require the same 3 steps to success, in my experience. In today's newsletter I would like to share them with you.
3 Steps to Create Your Dream Wardrobe/Career/Life
Step 1: CONNECTION
I know, I know, I am always talking about the concept of connecting with yourself and I make no apologies for this. This is the mindset work that transformed my whole life! (And, yes, my wardrobe too). I implore you to take the time to do this; it makes a world of difference.
Before I could go shopping for my client, I would need to know who she was. I began by answering the following questions:
- What colours suited her?
- What colours did she actually like?
- What was her body shape?
- What clothes did she feel more 'at home' in?
- What was her personality like?
- What job did she do?
- What did she spend the majority of her time doing?
- What were her desires?
I would ask questions to get a real sense of 'who she was'. Knowing her colouring and body shape was only a very small part of the process (although vital of course); however, just because she looked incredible in a bright yellow turtleneck didn't mean she would want to be seen dead in it! You have to know who you are before you can move onto the next step...
Application: Let's apply this to your life/career: discovering 'who you are' will help you answer the next question: What do you want from your life/career?
Step 2 :: CLARITY
Once I had a clearer idea of who she was, I needed to know what she wanted to achieve. She needed to decide on what image she wanted to portray. To do this, I would ask her to come up with 3 words to sum up her ideal wardrobe.
For instance, my 3 words are: feminine, sexy, creative. When shopping for clothes I always ask myself: "Will this item make me feel feminine, sexy or creative?" If the answer is no, I put it back and save my money!
I would then ask her to create a Pinterest board of what her ideal wardrobe would look like. Her job was to help me help her by selecting a variety of trousers, tops, skirts, tops, accessories and overall outfits that made her say 'WOW!' I would then go out and scoured the shops to find them.
This process of creating a board took a little time but was the difference between:"Oh that's a nice top," and "Oh my God, I LOVE it" Invariably the items I then selected were never an exact replica of what she had pinned but it was the overall effect that I was looking for.
Application: Let's apply this to your life/career: get really clear on how you want your life/career to look like? This is the difference between: "my life is mediocre" and "I freaking LOVE my life!" I know which you would prefer, right?! Start a Pinterest board of your own with want you want your life to be like. For inspiration you can see my Pinterest boards here>>
3 :: CONFIDENCE
I am sure you can see the importance of knowing what suits you, what you like to wear, and then getting clear on what you want to achieve. Many image consultants would stop there... not me! I saw far too many women create their Pinterest board and then, when I presented the items for them to try on, they would change their mind.
I would get responses like: "Oh I don't think I could wear that." "I don't think my husband would want me to wear that." "I don't have the confidence to wear that." "I'd stand out if I wore that."
I had selected similar items to the ones on her Pinterest board; therefore, she had told me that's what she wanted! So what had gone wrong?
I will always remember my first personal shop. It was a total failure (in my eyes) and I was devastated. I didn't even let her pay me! She had lost 8 stone (yes, EIGHT) and looked incredible. We had met up and she'd informed me that she wanted lots of bright patterns. I am trained in colour so I knew which would suit her, and I also knew which cuts would flatter her body, so I selected accordingly. I shopped to the brief she gave me.
So what was the problem?
Her self-esteem was in a different place to where she wanted to be. She wasn't ready to 'own' her dream wardrobe.
Simply put: She lacked confidence.
So the final step is feeling confident enough to go out there and wear whatever the heck you want to. If you feel good in it then wear it! But that is of course easier said than done, which is why I trained to become a Confidence Coach; I couldn't bear to see one more woman suffer in that way and hold herself back. When my first client is 90 she will look back and wish she had gone out there and flaunted her beautiful body in those bold patterns.
Application: Let's apply this to your life/career: don't let your dreams be dreams! If you have got to the point where you know what you want in life then do yourself the biggest favour...step outside your comfort zone and go and claim it, my love!
To help you do just that...
I will be holding a FREE 3-part teleclass to show you how I coach my clients to get the connection, clarity and confidence to transform their life:
Part 1: connect with who you are Part 2: clarity on what you want Part 3: confidence to turn dreams into REALITY
Watch this space to be the first to sign up.
Much love, Emma xx
Photos source: Pinterest