I have been so touched by the candid responses to my Body Confidence Survey. Thank you to everyone who completed it.
Here are some of the results so far:
Question: How does your body image hold you back in life?
- 86% Notice only negative things in the mirror;
- 80% Criticise their body regularly;
- 79% Constantly compare themselves to others;
- 64% Feel generally miserable when they think about their body;
- 58% Find it hard to accept compliments;
- 57% Are body-conscious in social situations;
- 50% Hate shopping for clothes;
- 36% Wish they had a more exciting wardrobe but don't have the confidence to "pull it off";
- 35% Are self-conscious in front of their partner;
- 29% Say it affects their sex life;
- 15% Skip events because they don’t think they look good enough;
Question: How would you sum up how you feel about your body? (Here are just a few of the responses)
- "Imperfect. Disgusting."
- "Gross, sad, ugly"
- "Disappointed, unhealthy, wobbly, blobby, fat"
- "Inelegant & clumsy"
- "Fed up. Dejected. Demotivated"
- "Fat and unattractive"
- "Disappointed. Old. Aged. Frustrated"
- “Some days we're friends but more often than not me and my body are barely pals, it tries to get me to like it but some days it's just not going to happen."
- "Unhappy, frustrated, unattractive"
- "Could be improved!"
This makes me so sad but I also get it! I used to feel all these things too. Today, I want to share my mindset tips for instantly feeling better about yourself and the way you look, especially if you have a social event you've been dreading!!
HERE IS MY '6 STEP EMERGENCY MINDSET GUIDE FOR GETTING BODY-CONFIDENCE FAST!'
1 :: THINK OF YOUR 95 YEAR OLD SELF
When you’re 95 will you care what you looked like? Will you be wishing you'd been thinner, taller or prettier? Or will you wish you'd just had more fun in your life?
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” Mark Twain
2 :: STOP WAITING FOR YOUR ‘REAL LIFE’ TO START
How often do we say: “When I look _____, I’ll feel happier.” Sorry to spoil the ending for you but you won’t! Harsh but true. Stop putting your life on hold. Live now. This is your life - right here, right now!
When you reach your ideal weight you won’t feel any more confident unless you work on the real issue.
Which leads me on to the next point...
3 :: YOUR BODY CONFIDENCE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH YOUR ACTUAL BODY!!!
It's all between the temples!
Yep! That's right. Your level of body confidence is all mindset.
We all know people who don't see their beauty. I've worked with many teens and adults who tell me how disgusting different parts of their bodies are. I literally don't see it! I don't get what they find so repulsive about themselves. That made me realise that perhaps I too was being far too critical of my own appearance.
There are people out there in the world who'd love to have YOUR hair face, nose, eyes, teeth, boobs, stomach, arms, bum, leg etc.
4 :: ZOOM OUT!
When we look at ourselves it becomes far too easy to focus on the parts we dislike. Instead take a step back and ‘zoom out’. Look at yourself as a whole package rather than just the areas you dislike. Then highlight your favourite features.
5 :: YOU'RE SOOOO MUCH MORE THAN YOUR APPEARANCE!
When you think about what you love about your best friend, mum or sister I can pretty much guarantee it has very little to do with their appearance. We don’t like and love people just because of their outer shell. We love them for who they are. Remember that. People at the social gathering want to be with you because of YOU and not because of the way you look.
6:: USE THE F-WORD
And no, I’m not talking about 'FAT'.
Do you want to go to the social gathering? If not, why? You need a reason better than: “I don’t like the way I look.” Or “I have nothing to wear.” Trust me, you’re going to feel a heck of a lot worse if you stay at home because you feel unattractive than if you get your gladrags on, pour yourself a glass of wine and say: “F@#k it, I’m going to have fun tonight.”
Give these a try and let me know how you get on, I'd love to hear from you.
P.S. Wondering how you can transform the relationship you have with your body? I've created a BODY CONFIDENCE course just for you. Find out more here.